Everyone knows that I have been trying to move to the East Coast for a little while. Stuff like money and jobs and selling houses are getting in the way so I have come up with a brilliant idea that will solve all the problems. Thought you would like to get in on it--seeing as it is completely beyond awesome.
First off, we will have to sell the house. Commuting will be tiresome at best, exhausting at worst. So the house will have to get fixed up, holes patched, doors replaced (not like we have holes in them or anything), rooms hoe-ed (I spelled it hoed but it looked like toad) out and stuff thrown away. We will get down to the bare minimum of stuff. Then after the house sells, we will buy an extra large RV. I'm sure that fitting six people, 2 large dogs, two cats, and some basic living supplies won't be an unsurmountable problem. And I have to take my bed. I love it. That is one of the requirements for measuring the RV--bringing the mattress along (it's slightly heavy and cumbersome but I'm sure Shawn will appreciate the opportunity to work out while shopping). Then we will all pile into the RV (after buying it naturally) and begin the drive to Maryland. Hopefully by this time we will have a job--if not, we will find ways to compensate.
When in Maryland, we can find a piece of land that is relatively cheap--the houses aren't because they are using pure gold to build them with, and park our luxurious RV on our piece of dirt. Then because all boys love spending time camping and in the outdoors, we are going to GIVE each of our children their very OWN tent. Won't they be incredibly happy. Almost to tears. Since we won't have a mortgage payment, any proceeds from the sale of the house can go to building an--INGROUND pool! And maybe a garage to park the boat in. Then, because we will need steady income, I will start walking dogs regularly. I mean, other people's dogs--because well, I'm already walking my own and since people are desparate to stay on their couches and watch the latest installment of reality TV, they will happily pay me to give their doggy some much needed exercise. So I'll be able to take the dogs to the beach, walk them, let them swim (of course they will all love me soooo much they will come when it's time to go home and not go running off chasing mindless seagulls or pigeons or cats). Then Shawn, since he won't have a job to hang out at all day--can help me in MY business. If he wants to. Or he can hike up to the nearest ski resort and become a ski instructor. And then a waterski instructor in the summer for those of you smartypants who are thinking you can't ski in the summer--YOU CAN. ha ha. Then the kids will love going to Grandma and Grandpa Whitcomb's house-because it's a HOUSE with indoor plumbing--even though boys enjoy doing things that shouldn't be done outside that girls can't do outside--and because Grandma is going to make them tons of sugar sweets and cookies and then leave them in a bowl in the cupboard and take them down when the boys come to visit-no matter how stale they get. (It runs in the family)
When we want to go on vacation-we can just pack up the tents--and TAKE the house with us. Yes, even the kitchen sink. That way, we won't bother people about staying in the homes, or having to pay for hotels. I'm sure we will LOVE having such family togetherness and everyone will get along beautifully (probably only when they are asleep). Since the RV will have only a small kitchen, I'll just assign each person one night to cook, and on Sundays, we'll have leftovers. Then because money will mostly likely get tighter--we can get chickens, our own cow, a herding dog for our one cow, and some horses (to save on gas and fertilizer for the soil). We can start growing all our own food--and because we will have such a large garden that is strictly organic--our neighbors will come in droves to buy our fruit and veggys. Think of how un-materialistic we will be: growing our own food, canning it in jars we can blow ourselves, making our own candles; we won't need furniture, or tons of decorations to make our home look like the Jones', or even toys for the kids--they will have the great outdoors as their playground.
It's such a brilliant idea--ok so it has a few kinks in it here and there but it incredibly doable. Shawn isn't as into this idea as I am though. He still thinks we have to buy a house to live. Hmmm. I KNOW if I work out a few details though--he will be SOOO on board. Well, I have to go RV shopping...
